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 [Takeshi Kinzoku/ Jutsu Registration]

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Dominic Edrick
Shiokage
Dominic Edrick


Posts : 971
Ryo : 64600

Ninja Info Card
Chakra:
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PostSubject: Re: [Takeshi Kinzoku/ Jutsu Registration]   [Takeshi Kinzoku/ Jutsu Registration] - Page 2 I_icon_minitimeTue Aug 28, 2012 4:58 pm

Ok, one issue is the size from C rank to B. It goes from a single ft wide to 4. But it only doubles from 4 to eight. Gotta make the gain consistent. The cooldowns are rather low, and the D rank needs one, even if its low. Lastly, you gotta state whether or not the lower ranks can be used even after using a higher rank. Ex: once you use the A rank, the S is no longer available. If you use the S rank, the jutsu is unusable the rest of the topic, so on and so forth.
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Takeshi
Hebikage
Takeshi


Posts : 615
Ryo : 22500

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Chakra:
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PostSubject: Re: [Takeshi Kinzoku/ Jutsu Registration]   [Takeshi Kinzoku/ Jutsu Registration] - Page 2 I_icon_minitimeTue Aug 28, 2012 6:55 pm

To address the size issue, I was trying to keep it as consistent as possible while not overpowering this technique in compassion to the spirit canon, which has the same power as the A rank gun but more girth and less length.

To limit overuse of the gun I'll say that you can only use the technique up to three times per topic regardless of which rank is used with the exception of the E rank since as it states in the technique is not for combat anyway as it causes not damage or burns.
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Dominic Edrick
Shiokage
Dominic Edrick


Posts : 971
Ryo : 64600

Ninja Info Card
Chakra:
[Takeshi Kinzoku/ Jutsu Registration] - Page 2 Left_bar_bleue410/410[Takeshi Kinzoku/ Jutsu Registration] - Page 2 Empty_bar_bleue  (410/410)

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PostSubject: Re: [Takeshi Kinzoku/ Jutsu Registration]   [Takeshi Kinzoku/ Jutsu Registration] - Page 2 I_icon_minitimeTue Aug 28, 2012 10:26 pm

Try to find consistency with the size change between them, maybe only having them double as they grow in rank, then add to the cooldowns. As mentioned, if A rank is used, S should not be available. And if S is used none except E are available. This is used in multiple breakdowns that we have done and if you remember, it was us who came up with it when attempting to create CES way back when.
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Takeshi
Hebikage
Takeshi


Posts : 615
Ryo : 22500

Ninja Info Card
Chakra:
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PostSubject: Re: [Takeshi Kinzoku/ Jutsu Registration]   [Takeshi Kinzoku/ Jutsu Registration] - Page 2 I_icon_minitimeWed Aug 29, 2012 1:52 am

I can see what you mean, started the E rank at 6 inches and doubled the width with each rank and added in the rank use limitations at the end of the first paragraph.
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Takeshi
Hebikage
Takeshi


Posts : 615
Ryo : 22500

Ninja Info Card
Chakra:
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PostSubject: Re: [Takeshi Kinzoku/ Jutsu Registration]   [Takeshi Kinzoku/ Jutsu Registration] - Page 2 I_icon_minitimeSat Sep 01, 2012 7:55 pm

All things we discussed on the phone have been taken care of.
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Dominic Edrick
Shiokage
Dominic Edrick


Posts : 971
Ryo : 64600

Ninja Info Card
Chakra:
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PostSubject: Re: [Takeshi Kinzoku/ Jutsu Registration]   [Takeshi Kinzoku/ Jutsu Registration] - Page 2 I_icon_minitimeSat Sep 01, 2012 10:36 pm

Ok, its all there. I had said somewhere between 20-25k, so I will meet you in the middle. 22,500 ryo.
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Takeshi
Hebikage
Takeshi


Posts : 615
Ryo : 22500

Ninja Info Card
Chakra:
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PostSubject: Re: [Takeshi Kinzoku/ Jutsu Registration]   [Takeshi Kinzoku/ Jutsu Registration] - Page 2 I_icon_minitimeSat Sep 01, 2012 11:19 pm

Gonna bum 2k off Shitai for this, Ryo deducted
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Takeshi
Hebikage
Takeshi


Posts : 615
Ryo : 22500

Ninja Info Card
Chakra:
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PostSubject: Re: [Takeshi Kinzoku/ Jutsu Registration]   [Takeshi Kinzoku/ Jutsu Registration] - Page 2 I_icon_minitimeFri Sep 07, 2012 7:57 pm


Name: Rairyū no Tatsumaki (Lightning Dragon Tornado)
Canon/Custom: Canon
Rank: B
Type: Ninjutsu
Element: Raiton
Distance: 100 feet
Description: Requires a number of rounds charging chakra through the user's body equal to the number of rounds that would otherwise be used to perform hand seals. After charging is complete the user will then begin to spin in place forming a whirling vortex of wind and electricity. The vortex will take on the form of a dragon's head and will cover the area in front of him. It will then strike out against his opponent and painfully trap them in the vortex, if trapped within this vortex your entire body is covered in deep lacerations (about three inches) and second degree burns. Even if the attack doesn't directly connect with the foe, the lightning can jump from the vortex to hit a target within ten feet of the dragon itself to cause first degree burns. The fully extended dragon is one hundred feet long and fifteen feet across (diameter). If it runs into another material it will be stopped unless that material is only as hard as steel or lower, which in that case the dragon can destroy and pass through to continue towards its target. The dragon lasts for a total of three rounds, meaning the user can continue to spin and thus control the dragon's movements for that long though they can not perform any other action nor can they begin charging chakra for anything else. The dragon moves at a speed of 45 mph. The dragon, however, will go away and the jutsu will end after if hits a target; meaning when it hits a person the damage is done and the dragon goes away regardless of if it has been 3 rounds yet or not. Once per topic.

When used with the kiba swords the additional 5 chakra to use the technique need not be paid as this technique is one that originally was made from those weapons and was later adapted for use without them. As is the ability of the weapon use of the blades increases the rank of the jutsu by one and raises damage from it accordingly, raising direct damage from the dragon to 5 inch lacerations and third degree burns and in-direct damage (the stray bolts bouncing off it within 10 feet) to second degree.

11,000 Ryo

Buying this tech out of the database. Ryo deducted
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PostSubject: Re: [Takeshi Kinzoku/ Jutsu Registration]   [Takeshi Kinzoku/ Jutsu Registration] - Page 2 I_icon_minitime

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